27th November

Hello John

Leigh has just come back from Bombay and is sleeping and I’m sitting here watching the euro. I’ve gone into a couple of trades and made 4 and lost 5. I went in on the second trade too late.

Today I am going to work by myself. Although I enjoy working with Darren I feel that I am lead into trades through his decisions and not my own. He’s a good trader and I tend to listen to him and we’ve traded as a team. By doing this I’ve lost my confidence and there have been times when he’s entered trades I’ve stayed out of and he’s made a loss and I just sat and watched and its been vice versa although more me staying out of trades.

I would say to him this is a trade to get in at such and such a point and he’d question me and then wham it takes off and neither of us have entered it. It’s happened time and again. My hesitation kept me out. This happens the other way as well and I stop him entering trades because of my hesitation.

After a lot of thought I’ve decided I need to start trading on my own again and regain what I’ve learned and let the charts talk for me. I find I get into the zone better, see when to keep out of trades and when to get in. My frame of mind is clearer as I’m depending on my own knowledge and for a while I want to do it this way. I did fine on my own before I met him and still did ok when we worked together but by and large I have to be honest and say I do better on my own.

I will still chat to him and discuss trades but I’m finding to be successful I have to be a one man show. He’s not to blame. It’s me. It’s so easy to let someone better than you lead you. You don’t learn like that. When watching you trade, I could have entered the trades as well but I’d have followed you blind and not looked at the facts.

That’s why I watch you and listen and learn. After we end our conversation I think to myself that you are probably saying silly woman here’s a perfect opportunity for her to get into trades yet she watches me. The same with the webinars. I’m done with them. The last one was a disaster and we got out even. Iain went into the trade with us and he said ‘Mom there are no indications that say you must buy here. The opposite, you should be selling. ‘. Iain was right and it made perfect sense. When it got to 0 we heaved a huge sigh of relief. The following day we heard that they lost 35 pips.

Darren is so good and so kind and my nature lets him lead and I follow and by doing that I loose my knowledge. This is not good. So for now I’m fully back to basics to test what I have learned and not be influenced by when to enter and exit trades. Last night I made 5 pips on the DAX while on my own. I felt comfortable. I discussed this with Darren later on and he said he’s tried to get in then but he kept being re-quoted. I think his internet connection in Budapest isn’t great as I never had a single re-quote yesterday. I didn’t close my CMC account and messed about with it and as it allows me to bid smaller amounts I am able to set my stop and trail it. It’s complicated but until I’m ready to trade £10 a pip I will stay with this and VT. VT is my favourite and I may end up keeping one account only. The indices are great and I’ll get there as my knowledge of trading gets stronger again.

I set up the charts on GFT and went into a few demo trades. It is a pleasure trailing your stop. What I wasn’t able to find is the spread band line. I went to support and they were very helpful. They told me my demo account is for a limited time only and once I open my main account I will have access to a demo account as well.

Please bear with me and don’t get frustrated that I’m whimping out. On the contrary I am more determined than ever to get this going but right now I feel as if I’m building a house on beach sand and the sea is eroding the foundation. I will get back on track again but there has been a dip in my confidence and trading and I need to get that back again. I am also going over your first course again. I know I can do it. I’ve proved it to myself and I need a bit of time to get back into the groove.

I managed to find the spread-betting section on GTF and I see I have to open an account with £1700 and also trade at £10 a pip. Ouch. I’m not there yet so for now I will stick with VT. See how you get on with the platform and take it from there. Leigh told me as a non resident in the USA I only pay a very small percentage on a pathetic interest anyway so that’s not an issue. Not at the level I’m trading now. In a few months time I intend adding quite a lot more money into the account so I can bid higher.

Today being Thanksgiving it will be interesting to see what the markets do. They euro is sluggish and in a channel. One thing I’ve learned is when to stay out and the channel is too narrow to make any proper moves. What I’ve done is reduce the charts to a more realistic look. The 1m tends to have long candles and what I’ve done is reduce it so that the spread line is the same thickness as on the 5m chart. That tells a different story. Too often I’ve entered trades when the candles were unrealistically long, looking as if they span 20 pips yet in reality only 5. I use the 1m to get into the trade and then the 5 to stay in. I have to get my entries and exits sorted again. I hesitate too much.

Fear of loosing and when entering the trade that it goes 10 against me before it turns shows I’m entering at the wrong time. Now that I stick to the money management and bid smaller and with realistic stops I feel better and I will increase my stake as my bank increases. A serious case of back to basics. Every trade I entered today I was able to control and twice got out at 0.

It’s warmed up here a bit and the snow has melted. I need to pack now and get ready to head out after lunch to the airport for our flight to EDI. Thank goodness the flight is not that full so we’ll get first class seats. The flight is very short 6 hours and you cant get much sleep but the food is worth staying up for.

We really want you to come to the States and visit. I will get the website going and I want Tanya my daughter to design a cover for the cd for the American market so it’s got a different look to the UK one.


Have a good one

Regards

Desiree